Can’t be arsed

 

I’m having a severe case of Can’t Be Arsed at the minute.  Days are blending.  I’m getting very little done.  I wake up a little come evening for some reason and so I get to sleep later (my body doesn’t want to sleep before 2 or 3am) and wake up later.

I think it’s funny that I am inventing reasons to leave the house to try to stem this inexorable tide of can’t-be-arsed-ness.  I’m not one of those people who can go out just because one shouldn’t stay indoors all day.  I have to have a reason, however flimsy.

So, I go to the shop for a magazine.  I go to the shop for any other thing I can think of.  Also, I go to the gym, but – and this is the funny part – I don’t go for the workout.  I go because it’s the only way to ensure I have a shower.  How lame is that?

I don’t do much if anything in the gym, like, maybe 1o minutes treadmill walking at OAP pace, before scarpering back to the changing rooms for that all-important shower.  But, I say, whatever gets us through, right?  We may have funny rituals and weirdnesses, but if it gets us through then it can’t be bad.

Anyway, just thought I’d share that.  I’m actually just writing this to put off today’s gym visit, but it needs to get done.  I haven’t showered for two and a half days now…

Mood again

 

Christ, I’m flat as a pancake today.  It’s difficult to know what to do about it because my brain feels sludgy.  Yesterday I felt ropey as well but I had a craft class to go to and, despite thinking I really didn’t want to go, it turned out to be a welcome diversion for a couple of hours.

Today I went for a walk – it’s sunny and I’m told on good authority that walking + being outside = Good4You.  Again, it was a diversion.  It was something I thought I ‘should’ do just in case this pancake mood decides to go all fruity on me and takes me to the next level of mood-low. 

I am detatched and hazy.  I hope it doesn’t stick round long.

Pictures of apathy

 

AN ARM

A LEG

A SHROUD

DETRITUS

TOMB DOOR

Depression diary

 

Things have started to slow down a little.  I’m a little cloudier in my thinking, a little slower in my sentence-forming.  It’s not agonising; it’s just a bum note.  I should also say that there isn’t a particular reason for this slowing.  I could come up with possible reasons I could/should feel a bit low, but they would be specious.  After all, there are always things happening that can be pulled together to form a case to support a change in mood, for better or worse.

One thing: I do think that the pull towards autumn can affect me.  Even just knowing that it can affect me can be enough to affect me prematurely (btw I spent five minutes trying to remember the word ‘prematurely’ and then just used a thesaurus).

Enough of that.  I went on a second date with Guy-Previously-Mentioned.  I have been meaning to update on that as well as post pictures of a couple of nice places I’ve been of late.  I also have a few ‘topical’ posts which, due to my lack of concentration/desire to edit properly, are no longer topical!  Like the Pope visiting, for example.  Still, there’s some meat on the topical bones of those posts that I would, brain permitting, like to finish and put out there.

Hope anyone reading this is well xx