Sadness weighs a lot, I think. It isn’t a light thing, “a wil ‘o’ the wisp, a clown” (are those even the right words to the song?) Something about ‘flibberty gibbets’ in there somewhere too.
Today in my group – oh! how many groups I have attended over the years, I really should be due a HRH stamped letter inviting me up for a medal by now – today, we talked about pain in the physical way since there are varying degrees of pain among M.E./CFS sufferers. We talked about practicing mindful awareness of the pain and unpleasant emotions and resisting the urge to push them away.
It was like, if you can move towards the unpleasant, the necrotic, the upsetting, you can absorb it and then notice other pleasant things that would otherwise have passed you by.
It’s second nature for me to avoid my negative emotions. But I understood what they meant – that avoiding makes your body and brain tense up and that then causes more pain. It also creates a monster that you never see because you’re turning away.
I honestly don’t know if I can do what they are suggesting – I know the idea of it puts me on edge – but as a good, long-time group attendee I usually nod in the affirmative when they look round the room “is everyone okay with giving that a go, then?”. Again, where’s my medal?